Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Dear Reactive Hypoglycemia

Dear Reactive Hypoglycemia,

I don't think it is cute that you have a nickname, RH, and that more and more people know your name. I don't like that you come and go when you please and that there is no rhythm to your rhyme. I'm not happy with you right now at all.

Usually I like new friends. I like to get to know them, learn about their lives, but see you are not a friend. You are not someone I want to know and didn't chose to know you. You came into my life and now you are here and I fear that you are going to be around for awhile. I didn't ask you to be a friend. I didn't ask for you to come into my life and take over my day or my night or to come and play with my sugar when you please.

I would much rather find a way to live peacefully together where if you are going to be here that we have a way to co-habitat where there is some type of mutually nice relationship, but I fear this is not going to be easy. I am going to tell you that you make me feel like a slave to my glucose meter - and I had WLS to be rid of diabetes and pricking my fingers. You make me feel imprisoned having to carry glucose tablets for a just in case emergency and I had WLS to be rid of carrying around meds to fix a problem. You make me feel like a failure despite the huge weight loss, clothing sizes, and lack of prescriptions - but you...you make me feel like I'm doing something wrong! Because of you I had to add back in carbs. Because of you I've gained a few lbs back...precious lbs that I worked hard to get rid of. Because of you I feel like I'm a burden to my husband and I hate that feeling....I don't like you.

I am frustrated. I am pissed off. I am sad. I am mad. I'm just GRRRRRRRR. RH I don't want to be your friend. I will find a way to deal with you and handle you instead of you having the upper hand. I don't want you to run my life AT ALL. I kicked anxiety. I kicked depression. I kicked obesity though I still fight them on an off and I WILL KICK YOU.

I'm sorry but you are not welcomed on this journey any more!


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