Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Pre-op Tomorrow

Lots of things are coming to an end and many things are new on the horizon. It is so odd to think that in less than two weeks there will never be an option for a soda again, no more ice cream or pies, not even a little bit of sugar; then again it is also hard to realize that in less than two weeks I won't crave food in general, that I will be eating to survive than for enjoyment, and on Jan 10th (with hopes and blessings) I will begin my new life as a bariatric surgery survivor and on a new path in life.

I am ready for something new. It is a road of uncertainty, but also with new rules and guidelines. I just haven't walked these guidelines, these new roads. I wonder how I will feel a week from now? I wonder how I will feel two weeks from now? I wonder if I will look back and be able to really see the gift I've been given. The chance at something new on the year that I will be turning 30.

I saw my therapist today and we talked about being ready and mentally preparing for surgery. She and I both agree that I am ready. I have realistic goals. I have a realistic and rational mindset and that I am going to be a successful patient after my surgery. That really gave me a boost. I know in the final days toward surgery I need to wrap my head around the actual going to the hospital and getting my tummy sewn up thing going, but right now I'm just in the process of getting things done.

I went through my to do list with her today and wow....I've accomplished a lot! still things to do. just because i'm a visual person here is what i've done:

1. made food shopping list for post-surgery
2. got calendar for "what i can eat when" list for hubs and i
3. changed all meds over to non-enteric coated pills
4. checked in with pysch med doc for pre-surgery
5. pre-surgery therapy session
6. stopped taking birth control on the 27th per surgeon
7. all paperwork is in order with work for time off
8. all paperwork filed with insurance
9. new insurance card filed with Vanderbilt
10. got health savings account figured out for surgery
11. found out deductible to be paid at surgery date
12. notified all docs about upcoming surgery
13. all bills paid for january (nothing to worry about post surgery)
14. follow up appts made
15. follow up appt with Melissa and Brynda made
16. 2nd room in apt cleaned and organized
17. craft projects for post surgery picked out
18. paperwork for life organized for january
19. all appts on calendar and accounted for

things to get done:
1. go shopping
2. clean off food shelf
3. pack hospital bag
4. organize bedroom and deep clean bathroom prior to surgery
5. get toe nails and nails made all pretty
6. plan for justin to contact post surgery to notify all that is well
7. list of numbers in case of emergency to keep in the house for justin post surgery
8. organize surgery binder in case of questions
9. cheat sheet with protein foods on fridge
10. copy protein / liquid food log
11. find all of the measuring cups
12. buy protein powder
13. buy vitamins and calcium +D
14. make a list of questions to ask nutritionist for pre-op
15. make a list of questions to ask doc
16. make a weight loss chart

wow when i put it all down i feel really accomplished and then i look at my to do list and go...i got this! i think that most of that to do list can be done this weekend before work starts back on the 3rd. i'm confident, i'm secure, and i'm loved. i feel really supported in my effort to fight the bulge and i'm ready to take it on. of course i'm already scared about the IV....we'll see how pre-op blood draw goes tomorrow. fingers crossed okay. deep breaths.....note to self: bring kitty with me so that i have something to hang onto for dear life while they search for veins.

in all honesty as it approaches i feel a load a weight....a feeling life off of me. i have that warm feeling of hope that surrounds me...and its getting stronger. i don't think i've ever prepared for anything this much except for when i went to OPE to interview for jobs!!!!! i'm ready. knowledge in hand I will not "let fear guide me..." I am letting "facts guide me" as Dr. Clements says. D day is January 10th. Here I come!

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