Tuesday, August 30, 2011

from 4x to xl

today begins my journey into the non-honeymoon phase of my WLS. yes, it is sad to see that my new tummy "fred" and I have made it to month 7th and are almost going steady! i'm ready to kick it up a notch and get to "onderland" and it started today! tonight after work I went with one of my lovely RAs to zumba. let me tell you it was no easy task and this girl worked it...but I only made it through 45 min of the hour. i am worn out, and a little disappointed that i couldn't finish the full hour. i wanted to, but my body still has limits and i was working hard. hubs reminded me that a year ago i wouldn't of even made it through 10 min so 45 was huge accomplishment, but i felt defeated inside. i think what defeated me the most was knowing that i was really thirsty and not being able to intake the liquid i needed to in the quantities i wanted. it was hard being that thirsty and only being able to sip sip sip. it is something that i need to work on and figure out for me. its a learning process and it all starts with small steps. i'm so blessed to have staff members that are active and like to exercise. it gives me someone to go to the gym with and some accountability. tomorrow night another staff member and i will be trying another aerobics class. i know it is good to be active and even if i don't finish i'm starting!

tonight after aerobic work out hubs and i went and walked around and did some window shopping. i was at kohls and i saw they had winter clothes out and i saw some cute winter coats. i know that i'm going to need one since my old one is long gone so i took a stab in the dark and tried one on. i love pea coats and i thought it was cute why not. i picked up an XL and it fit! i stood there and took a pic and just smiled. the day i left for surgery it was snowing and i was bundled up in a tight 4x pea coat and here i am almost 8 months later in an XL! wow...how cool is that. i am going to wait a little while longer before i buy a coat for the winter, but i'm excited about having a stylish jacket.

i'm realizing now more than ever that i'm truly intimidated about clothing. i'm needing to do an overall and move out the last 18-20 clothes and go into XL and 16-18 bottoms and i'm intimidated and scared about clothes. i wander through the clothing sections and see things i like or interest me but i don't know what size to pick and i'm so scared of clothes. it is such a weird complex! i'm supposed to be enjoying this...but it really is scary. i'm super excited to go shopping with Mandy in a few days....here is hoping having another girlfriend with me will help me get over my fear of new clothes!

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