Bariatric Appointment Tomorrow

I get to go see my new bariatric doctor tomorrow for a follow up - since I'm a new patient - and we are trying to get a gage on me and how things are with my body. I have to admit, I'm not looking forward to it at all. I'm terrified to weigh in. I'm having a moment where I just feel as if I'm huge - I'm so big and so weighty that I'm going to be over 200 lbs and have continued to gain despite my eating healthy, making better choices, and interval training with jogging and walking. I always hate weigh ins, but this is just anxiety building and I just want to be below 194...because that is where I've been stuck and I've seen it go up as high as 197 lbs and I hate that. I really really hope that I'm not heavier, but lighter.