Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Blown Away Excitement

I have to admit that I was a litle concerned about posting about my weight loss surgery yesterday. I didn't know how people would respond, but I allow myself to be open and transparent as much as possible these days as its healthy both physically and mentally (especially with my anxiety). I don't like to have secrets like that and so when I posted it I knew that there would be either good or bad responses, but I'm overwhelmed with the love and the praise, and the encouragement I have gotten thus far!

I have always thought of my friends as my family and it is a vulnerable thing to put yourself out there on a limb, but it was a jump that was worth taking. I am still so excited that I could burst. I have my posted notes laid out on my desk with dates circled and a folder that is ever growing with information and paperwork. In addition to prepping for the surgical apptointment I am also learning to live now as a real diabetic and check my sugar and all that jazz. It is not the easiest thing to learn to live with and even though I'm now on a modified diet and medicine, it doesn't mean I don't have a sweet tooth.

For example yesterday, I ate 2 mini powder donuts and my sugar was up almost 90 points and then went back down. Its a roller coaster of up and downs if you don't watch it and measure what sugar and how much goes into you. It makes you feel so gross as well when your sugar is high. My head hurts, I get really tired, and when it was extrememly high I have trouble seeing. It's a wake up call as a reminder of why I am willing to go through WLS. I don't want to have to live like this if I don't have to and since I've fought being a full diabetic for 8 plus years, it saddens to me think that this is my new reality, but I will beat it. Just takes the swing of something new and different.

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